Hysterical Nursing Association Advises Pumping Ventilators by Hand to Reduce Carbon Footprint

By John C.A. Manley

Registered Ontario nurse Andrew Brannan sent the following letter to the Registered Nurses Association of Ontario in response to their claim that “Canada is burning and our future is in peril” due to… climate change.

As far as I know, Andrew still hasn’t received a reply to his well-written letter. So, being a fiction writer, I thought I’d offer an in-line fictional response:

Dear Doris Grinspun,

Alarmist emails from the Registered Nurses Association of Ontario (RNAO) claim, “Canada is burning and our future is in peril!”  Emotional appeals to a “climate emergency” are intended to frighten nurses toward demanding the abolition of fossil fuels.

Well, hospitals do specialize in emergencies, Mr. Brannan. It’s actually one of the few things we’re good at. If you just have mild health problems like diabetes or dementia or arthritis, we can’t really do much but mask some symptoms until you get deathly sick. But, come to us with a heart attack, cancer or a head-on collision — anything urgent, like where you’re almost dead — and we can help.

But the abolition of fossil fuels is murderous.

We prefer the term genocidal. Murder is too specific. It’s really nothing personal.

The vast majority of nurses in Ontario work in hospitals.

Are you sure? After so many were axed for not getting vaxxed I thought the majority of nurses were working in Walmarts and Tim Hortons.

For example, we observe the critical need for energy when the power shuts off on a patient’s ventilator.  According to the Canadian government, hospitals have “higher energy intensity than any other activity in the commercial and institutional sector.”

Much Ado About Corona: A Dystopian Love Story

Ah, you lazy nurse! A ventilator can be powered by a hand-pump. Don’t think you got the time? Since most hospitals are so big they take 15 minutes to walk across, they’ll be designated 15-minute cities. You’ll be living here 24/7. You and your family will have a tent assigned to you in the permanently vacant parking lot. You can all take turns pumping the ventilator.

Hospital energy consumption is to sustain life.  Hospitals store blood products and medication at specific temperatures. They sterilize equipment and run life support machines.

Listen, Mr. Brannan, you’re still not getting it. (It’s not your fault. We did give you all those booster shots.) One of the reasons we have to waste all that money storing blood and medication in refrigerators is because CANADA IS BURNING. If it weren’t for climate change we wouldn’t need refrigerators. Before humans started burning fossil fuels there weren’t no refrigerators. Look it up!

Critically, most hospital energy is for heating and ventilation systems.  These systems protect vulnerable people from the harsh Canadian elements.

You must be suffering from heat stroke. I already told you, CANADA IS BURNING. We don’t need to be heating no hospitals.

According to Public Health Ontario, advanced ventilation systems are crucial in reducing the transmission of pathogens, notably coronaviruses.

We don’t need no ventilation system when we got… face masks! I hope you were wearing yours when you wrote this letter.

Life-sustaining heating and ventilation systems in Ontario hospitals are powered mostly by natural gas.  And yet, RNAO calls for the abolition of natural gas.

Please don’t use the N word with me, Mr. Brannan. Don’t you know schools are banning Huckleberry Finn and To Kill a Mockingbird for using the N word? I would sure like to wash your mouth out with hand sanitizer.

Natural gas is a reliable, affordable, and scalable energy source that is the lifeblood of a hospital. RNAO’s call to abolish this energy source would result in mass death. Why is the RNAO promoting policies that would result in the mass extermination of human beings?

I do not understand your confusion in this matter, as we have been enacting policies to facilitate the “mass extermination of human beings” for decades now. We have principally focused on death through toxic medications, traumatic heart surgeries and (our favourite!) vaccines. Chemotherapy is also effective and profitable, but more time-consuming.

And, as you know, we’ve started experimenting with mRNA technology. Sadly, despite initial promising results, we have been disappointed with the death toll and overall participation.

But we never say die. Or, actually, we do. Quite often. But not for us. Well, maybe us, too. I haven’t really thought any of this through. Anyway, we will keep on concocting new polices to fulfill our psychopathic ambitions. Your letter’s dire warnings of the consequences of our climate change agenda makes me hopeful that we are very close to obtaining our genocidal goals.

Doris Grinspun

While I don’t agree with Grinspun’s claim that “Canada is burning,” I do agree (thanks to people like her) that “our future is in peril.” But we also have nurses like Andrew, who haven’t been afraid to speak out.

Well, maybe he was afraid, but he didn’t let it stop him.

Andrew started blowing the whistle on the COVID con back in 2021 through this newsletter under the pseudonym of “Nurse Andrea.” Check out this article where he unveiled his true identity. It includes links to the undercover interviews.

John C. A. Manley is the author of the full-length novel, Much Ado About Corona: A Dystopian Love Story. He is currently working on the sequel, Brave New Normal. John lives in Stratford, Ontario, with his son Jonah, and the ever-present spirit of his late wife, Nicole. You can subscribe to his email newsletter, read his full bio or find out more about his novel.

Image: MaRS

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