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What are you – stupid? A mask won’t protect you from coronavirus. You would need a medical-grade mask for that. Plus you’d need eye protection. On second thought, any cloth mask will do just fine. Wear one or we won’t allow you indoors. Stand 12 feet apart from people, too. Okay, 3 feet. Wait … make that … 6 feet.
We’re canceling sports, school, work and entertainment for two weeks. We meant indefinitely. We don’t have enough tests to test everyone. Our tests aren’t accurate. Our tests actually are accurate, and they’re mandatory.
You have to get vaccinated. All vaccines are equally effective. Except that one. Actually, that one is okay, too. Once you are vaccinated you won’t be able to contract or spread coronavirus. Turns out you can still contract and spread coronavirus after you’re vaccinated. You need multiple vaccinations. Anyone who doesn’t get vaccinated wants to kill the elderly.
Trust the science.™
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