Friday, November 16, 2012

Perpetual Victim Mentality is Doomed to Fail

J.P. Hicks
Activist Post

Do you ever say “nothing good ever happens to me?” Or do many of your conversations with friends end with “can you believe what that person did to me?”

If so, you may be suffering from a classic case of victim mentality.

When I meet people like this, I always ask what they want to have happen in their life. And, inevitably, they always give me a blank stare. It seems they’ve been too busy complaining to formulate goals for themselves.

What’s more, people who suffer from this victim disorder don’t realize that by constantly focusing on their complaints will only attract those gripes into their lives.

Success is actually a pretty simple formula: You are what you think you are. So if you’re always inferring that you’re a victim, you will always be a victim.

All it takes to be successful is to want to be and believe you are. I know for many reading this you’ll say it isn’t that simple. But it really is.

The hard part is putting aside the noise in your head that tells you you’re not good enough or that people are out to get you. Yet, once you make the decision to stop being a victim and to take control of your life that noise will disappear.


You will never hear a happy and successful person moaning about what someone else did to them. That’s because successful people don’t waste energy worrying about what other people did to them.

They may examine which of their own actions caused that person to lash out at them, but they treat it as a lesson and simply plow forward on their path.

It’s also crucial to understand that you have no control over what others may or may not do to you. You’re only in control of what you do. But that’s where your true power is.

Only you can control how your life turns out from this point forward. Sure, others may try to put up roadblocks or sabotage you in some way. That means they aren’t using their energy to better themselves and they will ultimately reap the karma of their actions.

You, on the other hand, with new-found focus on what you want to happen I your life will ignore attempts by others to harm you.

"Holding onto a grudge is letting someone live rent-free in your head." -- Jeremy Cowart.

If you want to be successful, you must dismiss all negative thoughts towards others who you believe are out to get you. You must put intense focus on your goals, what you’re grateful for, and what makes you happy.

The good news is that when you shift your focus to your own path, you won’t have as much time to fret over what others are doing.

This is where setting goals and keeping your thoughts organized is vital to overcoming a victim mentality.

So go out and make your life what you want it to be.

J.P. Hicks is an info-activist, pro blogger, editor of Blog Tips and author of a book about blogging. Follow @ Twitter, or like on Facebook and get the FREE ebook SEO For Bloggers.


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8 comments:

Anonymous said...

This article is a joke. I expected to see a Madonna quote in it. Someone that just saw their child's head blown off in gaza just has a thinking problem. Get real!

Anonymous said...

Agreed - why is this article even on this site? Is this what alternative news and independent media has come to? Unrealistic feel good stories? This author is clearly in a bubble of some kind, and needs to realize no amount of postiive thinking can stop a bomb from falling on your family if you live in the west bank.

Anonymous said...

Nice article, great to see something positive once in a while. Pretty sure the author is talking about a mentality and not about people that are legitimate victims. He/she is talking about a mindset of positive thinking, that's all. Its beats sitting in corner and complaining about what "they" are doing to you all day long.

JCII said...

Perpetual victim syndrome I thought it was gonna be about the synagogue of satan.
israel aleays plays the victim while they are the psychotic aggressors for example.

Anonymous said...

"Success is actually a pretty simple formula: You are what you think you are. So if you’re always inferring that you’re a victim, you will always be a victim."

LOL! Sure, Bob. I get up everyday, look at myself in the mirror and tell myself that I am tall, blonde, sexy and rich. I also tell myself that today is the day when I win the lottery. As of this writing, I'm still short, fat, ugly, old and living in a Section 8 apartment on Social Security. This has only been going on for 75 years.

What a crock of shit!

Anonymous said...

Ever hear the saying "if wishes were horses beggars could ride"? Well? I believe that applies here, no matter how many times you mentally masturbate yourself with fantasies of the third dimension, they ain't gonna happen just because you wish them. So that, keep telling yourself XYZ mentally of delusion ain't gonna work. Coincidentally, has that worked for you yet, JP Hicks? Apparently not, cause you are...

:)

Anonymous said...

Perpetual victim mentality is doomed to fail? Oh, yeah? And perpetual mental delusions aren't?

Anonymous said...

LOL @ this don't worry be happy load of crap. It reminds me of an episode of Cheers where Rebecca is telling herself that today is the day she meets her millionaire knight in shinning armor. Today is the day that he comes in thru the door of Cheers and falls madly in love with her and whisks her away into his castle to be happy forever after. Today is the day that...well, you'll catch the drift. While she's repeating these delusions to herself, Sam is mouthing the words in the background, syllable by syllable. The moral of the story being that just because you tell yourself something, it doesn't mean it's going to happen. Coincidentally, the same applies to religion.

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