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I’m not as bright as many of you, I’m certainly not as a brave and it’s taken me a bit longer to seriously wake up. Where were you on 911? Were you sitting in front of a television set shouting, “terrorists with box cutters, this can’t be real!” Perhaps you weren’t shouting at all but a piece of you knew then that the narrative the journalists and politicians were giving had to be false. You couldn’t exactly articulate why you felt that way but the feeling was real. Still there were others like David Icke that knew well before the first plane hit that such a tragedy was part of the globalists’ future agenda. Perhaps he didn’t know the date or which American landmark the tragedy would occur but he knew such an event was planned and inevitable.
I didn’t have access to a television the day of 911. I was sitting cross legged on the ground in front of a humvee on an army base in North Carolina. We were entering the final phase of a two-week training opp. We were dirty, tired, and a bit confused when the Sergeant Major of our battalion brought us together and placed the field radio on the hood of the humvee. We listened to the president’s speech in silence. Ironically only hours before, the same Sergeant Major called us together to listen to the ‘motivational speech’ of a Special Forces veteran from Vietnam recount his harrowing tale of kicking down doors and closing on the enemy during a raid. We were all very excited.
Like the other guys in my unit, even after we got back to the barracks and finally had time to see the horrific images on television, my intuition remained dormant. I pushed any doubts I had about what we were being told deep down in my gut.
We got drunk that first night back waiting for orders. We huddled up together in my team leader’s room pumping ourselves up and talking about ‘glory’. There were even a few fist fights that night as we mentally got ready.
Sadly, I managed to keep that intuition — that intuition David Icke listened to so long ago — sealed tight in its little protective box for quite some time after that. Weeks went by, months went by, we deployed, we came back, my job changed, my rank changed but still I refused to listen. The problem with suppressing anything is that it is always dangerous. If you hold something that you know is right deep down inside for long enough it finds its way out eventually. The longer you hold it down, the more dramatic things seem when they come to the surface. I’m not going to burden you all here with the poor decisions I have made as a father, a husband and a man, but know that I had made plenty of bad decisions as I continued to ignore that inner voice.
Who really knows what force brought me to that first video three years after my discharge. My wife was at work and my daughter was in school. I was home alone once again and had nothing to do. The oddest thing of all was that even before I heard the experts make their scientific arguments contrary to the official report and the witnesses give their testimonies, it immediately became so obvious to me. I was watching the buildings fall again and again from our small apartment in North Jersey but a part of me was back in North Carolina, drunk, standing in my team leader’s room. I realized that even then my truer self, the more sober part of me knew that the official story was a lie, but unfortunately I had a job to do, a weapon to clean, a role to play.
Those first few alternative films on 911 served as needed guidance. I was slowly led to the edge of the rabbit hole. Strangely however, once I was at the edge and found myself staring down into the abyss there was something oddly familiar with what was before me. I was actually more horrified with myself than the global cabal who had committed those murders. I realized then how very capable I had been in silencing that inner voice that had been with me since the beginning. I realized also that it probably wasn’t the first time I had silenced it and I knew that if I wasn’t careful, it certainly wouldn’t be the last. I cried a lot that day. It was the most cathartic experience in my life. If only I knew it was just the beginning.
Now for someone reading this article, they might think, “Yeah, Tom finally got it. He woke up. Now I can get on with my day.” Well not exactly. You see David Icke’s films were a bit much for me even when I thought I was being completely open. I thought he was interesting and well spoken, but his ideas were a little far out there. The only difference this time however was that instead of running to the fridge, cracking open a beer, turning off the computer and turning the TV on, I very respectfully put Icke’s site on my favorites list and said to myself, “Perhaps I’ll be interested in what he has to say some other time.”
Jump forward one more year into the future, about a year before the present. I’ve just concluded another odd job and I’m online looking for the next. My wife is a bit angry because we don’t have a lot of money and I’m insisting, “I just need this one last book. I found it used. You can’t find this stuff at the bookstore.” Reluctantly, she finally gives in. I minimize Craigslist and then maximize Amazon on my laptop and I place my order.
David Icke’s book arrived two weeks later. Before I even got back to the front door, I tore off the packaging and held it in my hands and then just stood there. This sounds odd but I found myself in a near state of meditation. Up until that point in my life, I still very craftily had my life compartmentalized. I had all the great works (I thought they were great at that time) stacked neatly on my book shelf out in the open. Truth was still something I could only find or deal with when I was on the Internet.
I read David’s book quickly. While I was supposed to be looking for another job, I read and I read. The majority of the information his book contained was stuff I had already found on line or had known all along in my heart, but the ritual of feeling those pages, holding that book in my hand was significant. The reality is, we have all known what’s been right since the beginning. We all have the power to see through the veil that has been surrounding us for so long now. The bigger question is this, “Do we all have it in us to be as brave as David Icke?” Are we all capable of listening to that inner voice all the time? For me, I realize I can no longer make excuses. I am going to have to live my truth at all times of the day, in all situations, whether I am surrounded by family, friends or strangers.
The strangest things have happened to me this year. As we get closer to December 21st, 2012, I find myself doing things that I wouldn’t even have imagined a year ago. Like David Icke and many of you, I find myself really needing to seek some alternative spiritual guidance. I’ve become fascinated with the whole idea of past life regression therapy, but I had no idea where that road would lead me. Can you picture an ex-marine infantryman sitting on a psychics couch with incense burning in the background? I wouldn’t have been able to either.
Apparently I was a very outspoken critic of the shadow government in a past life. I gave some powerful speech somewhere and it so offended the powers-that-be that they imprisoned me, tortured me, and then brutally murdered me. Did this really happen, or is it just some psychological excuse for why I haven’t done more up until this point in my life? I’m not sure whether or not the answer really matters. I have finally come to terms with who I am and where I’m going. To my captors from a past life or to the captors in a future soon to come, I say this, “I love you, I’m sorry, Please forgive me, Thank you.”
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